One prayer I say, among all other things to pray about, during my morning prayer is clarity. I pray for clarity of what I should do with my daily life so that I can make a wise decision for any complicated matter, so that I can use my energy and time more effectively. I pray that God will give me clarity of the things He wants me to preach to my congregation so that I don’t have to face writer’s block or experience embarrassment for talking about a stupid thing during the Sunday morning service. Clarity, o, clarity, how I need that all the time… 

An over the counter allergy medicine gets it right when they visualize in their ad a blurry vision of a person when she has an allergy attack. This person has a hard time thinking and doing activities because she cannot see clearly. She takes the medication and, voila, everything becomes clear! I wish there were a medication that I can take to cure my “happen-so-often-blurry-mind.” Looking back at my life, I have reflected that a lot of things could have been handled better or would have fallen into a better time and place had I gotten the clarity to do the right thing. 

Have you ever been in a situation where you completely have no ideas what you are doing? You run around like crazy, going here and there and taking care of this and that but you are absolutely clueless about the reason why you have done what you did. And when you reflect upon everything you did during the day, you asked yourself, ‘what have I done today?’ because nothing gets done since you don’t know what you are doing. I’ve been there! 

The other day I stumbled upon a story about Mother Teresa of Calcutta. Let me quote it for you: 
The great teacher of ethics John Kavanaugh visited Mother Teresa while working for three months at her “house of the dying” in Calcutta. He was seeking clarity from God on the direction for his future. She asked him, “What can I do for you?” He asked, “Pray that I have clarity.”  

Mother Teresa said firmly, “No. I will not do that.” He was surprised and asked her why. She explained, “Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of.” Taken aback, he said, “But you seem to have clarity from God.” Mother Teresa laughed, “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.” (from Ruthless Trust)

I found myself dumbfounded by Mother Teresa’s statement. All this time, I was asking the wrong thing from God? It took me awhile to realize how true that statement is. We will never have true clarity of what we want, what we hope for, or what we do as long as we are humans. We are limited to know so much about our life. When we pray for clarity, in a way, unconsciously, we also pray for control over our own life so that we can do things we want to do with ease so that we may satisfy our own ego. When we decide, choose, and do the right thing, who would get all the praise? Ourselves, right? Therefore trusting God is all we could do while we’re still living in this world of uncertainties. For God is the one who carries this whole world in His hand.

Thinking about the heroes of the Bible, most of them, are not the visionary ones. So many of them were not even clear what they wanted to do in the beginning of their lives. Think about Abraham who did not know where to go, Moses had no idea that he was going to be the great leader of Israel, Peter thought that he would dedicate his whole life fishing, and Paul, he was clear that he would abolish Christians from this world, but it turned out, he became a great apostle. Who would’ve known? Yes, all these great heroes have one thing in common: trust. Even though they questioned it at first, their trust to the Almighty God helped them going through life. 

As for me, I still ask God for clarity. But this time I ask clarity to trust Him with all my heart. 

Love and prayers, 

Vincent Arishvara 02112016

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